Love is the source of everything good and as they say, it is always a work in progress. Love is something that really is not a feeling or a standalone experience that makes you happy or sad – it is a culmination of various aspects of life, your personality, your partner and of course, the many magical and mad situations that pop up everyday. So looking at love as an isolated feeling or an answer to everything is not the best way forward. Love comes from within and sort of mirrors its way to your heart again – through the love you give and the love you get. What goes around, comes around is something that’s very relatable to the experience called love and its one that that really doesn’t have a glass ceiling to break – you could keep giving, getting and get better at it everyday.
Whether you’re having a rock-steady relationship or if you are going through a rocky patch, there is always scope for improvement. So here are 7 important tips that could help you experience a more healthy relationship, or one that’s brighter and way cooler than before.
1. Let go of anxieties
We often worry about a zillion things and when in a relationship, it isn’t just about you anymore; you think about your partner, how he or she is going to take your tensions and more importantly how they are going to judge you. It is okay to let go, loosen up and it sure is a stepping stone for better understanding and love for each other. So let go of anxieties and you will be calmer and happier than before.
“Surrender to what is. Let go of what was. Have faith in what will be.” – Sonia Ricotti
2. Love yourself more
Start loving yourself, your personality and what you stand for. You cannot give unless you have, and the same holds true for love too. You cannot be a good lover unless you love yourself first.
“Love is not a relationship, love is a state of being; it has nothing to do with anybody else. One is not “in love”, one is love. And of course when one is love, one is in love – but that is an outcome, a by-product, that is not the source. The source is that one is love.” – Osho
3. Know what you want from your partner
This is important because love without expectations is just for the saints. Know what you want from love, and from your relationship and share it with your partner. Be clear and communicate your needs. Don’t expect them to read your mind, or expect them to know what you want when you aren’t even clear yourself.
4. Know what you can give
This will unlock the secret of what you want from the relationship, because after all love is all about give and take. So know what you can do for him or her and for your relationship before expecting something from the other.
“If you’re giving love and not receiving it, you’re not in the right relationship. If you’re receiving it and not giving it than you are taking advantage of the other person.” – Patti Stanger
5. Be brutally honest
Be brutally honest with yourself and you will automatically be with your love, lover and everyone and everything that matters. This is the most important technique to finding true love and making your relationship worthwhile. You have to be honest, you have to tell her or him if you like something, hate something, want something to change or are scared without a reason. It’s okay if you’re judged, but it will be far worse if what they think of you isn’t what you really are inside. Be honest and love will bloom. Yes, it is a slow ride but the only way that’ll make you a better person and a lover.
6. Don’t take silly things to heart
This is sort of like a contradiction because loving is all about the heart. However, like everything else, you need to filter stuff out, everyday. There could be good days and there could be bad ones but taking the tiny tiffs and the silly arguments to heart might not just hurt your ego, it could actually ruin your day and eventually your relationship too.
“Start the daily practice of not letting the little things bother you! If the little things ruin you what’s going to happen when the big things come along? Start practicing now for your big challenges in life.” – Bryant McGill
7. Don’t quit
Relationships won’t be perfect and that’s to be expected. They just need to be true. There will be lots of good moments and some bad ones too, but that doesn’t always mean that you should quit the relationship. A relationship that’s worth it is always worth fighting for, no matter how hard things get. Remind yourself that you’ll wade through the mess and that this is just a bad phase. Giving up is easy and the thought of quitting, which more often than not is the easiest option, is like a seed that’ll grow to screw everything up. So don’t ever think of quitting on your lover or your partner, and soon enough you’ll be sure that this one’s for life.
“If she’s amazing, she won’t be easy. If she’s easy, she won’t be amazing. If she’s worth it, you wont give up. If you give up, you’re not worthy. … Truth is, everybody is going to hurt you; you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for.” – Bob Marley
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Author: Tejaswi Bhagavatula
An avid biker, accountant and a not-too-bad writer dabbling across genres from business news for the Industrial Economist and real stories for The Better India, to love and relationships for The Bridal Box, social articles for Scoop Whoop and more.
