Having a successful marriage takes love, care, and a whole lot of work. Some golden advice for newlyweds is to learn to problem-solve, communicate regularly, keep dating each other, and be appreciative daily. By doing these things you’ll set yourselves up for a happy, fulfilling life together.
Here are 10 amazing pieces of advice for newlyweds on how to navigate intimacy issues and create a successful marriage.
1. There is a period of adjustment
As a newly married couple, it’s important to remember that there is going to be an adjustment period to your relationship after getting married.
You’re both getting into one another’s space, your social lives are different, and you’re not deciding on money matters together. Whether you aren’t used to living together yet or are coming down from the post-wedding blues, there is a real adjustment period.
2. Work on intimacy
As newlyweds, you’re not likely to have any problems in the bedroom for quite some time. But it’s also important to work on other aspects of intimacy, like creating an emotional bond of trust and working on other aspects of physical touch.
Did you know that studies show hugging is shown to decrease stress levels? Build intimacy and reap the benefits of physical touch by incorporating more hugs, kisses, and cuddling into your marriage.
3. Talk about kids ASAP
Don’t let this tricky topic trip you up! Many couples make the mistake of not talking about children before getting married, only to be shocked that their spouse doesn’t have the same opinion about family planning as them.
Honestly discuss your feelings about starting a family together. If you are not keen on having a baby, it’s also important to discuss what role birth-control will play in your marriage.
4. Learn how to problem-solve
A successful marriage doesn’t mean you and your partner will never argue. It means you have found a method of solving problems – not fighting about them. The main ingredients for problem-solving include:
- Listening without interrupting
- Having empathy for your partner
- Learning what triggers your spouse
- Communicating your thoughts and feelings
- Never resorting to name-calling or passive-aggressive remarks
- Looking for useful ways to solve the problem at hand
- Apologizing
5. Figure out your family situations
Some solid relationship advice for newlyweds for a successful marriage is to figure out what role your family is going to play in your marriage as early as possible.
Where will you spend holidays? This is a big question to consider with your spouse. Some married couples switch on and off each year on who to spend the holidays with, but sometimes even these simple arrangements can be complicated by one spouse’s divorced parents or religious beliefs.
Will your parents have a key to your home? This is another important consideration. While you may not have a problem with your parents waltzing into your home without knocking, your spouse will.
It is best to discuss the subject of in-laws as soon as possible to arguments and avoid intimacy issues in your marriage.
6. Communicate
Carve out some time each week to really talk to one another. Discuss troubles you’re having, funny stories throughout the week, or talk about life. Whatever you discuss, just make sure you’re communicating with each other regularly.
7. Keep dating
One of the biggest reasons couples grow unhappy is that they stop dating each other. That is to say, they stop trying to romance one another.
It’s natural to get a little comfortable once you and your spouse have tied the knot, but that’s no reason to get lazy about wooing one another.
Having a regular date night is a great way to stay excited about your relationship. Plan a fun or romantic night out (or in!) every week and stick to your dating schedule. Making a routine of having dates will remind you both to make romance in your relationship a priority.
A weekly date night a great way to ward off intimacy issues and build your sexual chemistry with one another. It also inspires romance, prevents boredom and brings excitement into your marriage.
8. Learn to let it go
When you blend two lives together, things are bound to get a little complicated. This is especially true for couples who haven’t lived together before marriage. Even if you get along famously, you are bound to have some disagreements.
Some fantastic advice for newlyweds? Learn to let it go.
She didn’t put the dog in the crate last night. He still hasn’t fixed the leaky shower head.
These are annoying little quirks of marriage. Especially if you have voiced your irritation over these foibles in the past. But are they truly worth losing sleep over? The answer likely is a big fat “No.” So don’t stress over it!
When it comes to the little things, just let it go.
9. Be appreciative
Studies show that the highest predictor of relationship satisfaction was expressions of gratitude in a marriage.
Go out of your way to look for sweet or thoughtful ways to express your appreciation to your spouse. Text them a cute list of the reasons you love them and give them compliments regularly.
Sometimes even trivial things such as leaving a love note against the bathroom mirror or filling up the car with gas can make all the difference in your spouse’s day.
10. Don’t stop doing the little things
As newlyweds, don’t let saying please and thank you fall by the wayside. There’s a reason why these were the first staples of manners your parents ever taught you.
Even after years of using manners with one another, normal phrases like ‘Thanks!’ may lose their charm. Be creative in the way you express gratitude to your spouse.
The next time you are thankful for something they did, try saying “I love that you _____, it really makes me feel _____”. Clarifying why your spouse’s kindness was valued will make them feel loved and appreciated.
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Author: Rachael Pace
Rachael Pace is a relationship expert with years of experience in training and helping couples. She has helped countless individuals and organizations around the world, offering effective and efficient solutions for healthy and successful relationships. She is a featured writer for Marriage.com, a reliable resource to support healthy happy marriages.