Self-confidence can make all the difference in the way that people treat you. And it can also have a huge effect on the ways that you interact with others.
A huge number of mental health issues have, at their roots, a connection with insecurity and a lack of self-confidence. These feelings can stifle any kind of creative or productive impulses and hold you back from much of what life has to offer. On the other hand, if you’re able to conjure up high levels of confidence, you’ll have the faith in your own abilities needed to get the most out of life. We’re going to look at a few proven ways of increasing your self-confidence, including:
- Who to surround yourself with
- How to deal with failure
- How to develop the discipline you need
1. Surround yourself with people you want to be like
A huge part of the way we define ourselves lies in our choice of friends. They are, if you are lucky, some of the people that you spend most of your time with. They also provide you with a sense of self, and provide something of a sounding board and mirror that allow you to understand yourself. As a result, if you want to get the most out of life, it’s essential that you surround yourself with people who offer the self-confidence you want to experience in your own life. We’re never too late to learn new patterns of behaviour. If you feel like you’re lacking in adequate self-confidence, developing friendships with people who display the characteristics you hope to achieve can make a massive difference. That way, you’ll be able to watch how your friends interact with others and learn from their behaviour. You’ll also benefit passively from simply being around people who display the characteristics you hope for. A natural desire to fit in with the crowd is enough to influence most people, even when they aren’t entirely aware of it. You may not know it, but simply being around the right people will gradually influence your own behaviour.
2. Don’t be scared of occasionally failing
It’s inevitable that we will all meet with failure at some points in our lives. However, for the unprepared, these failures can be enough to put you off of trying to achieve things. If you don’t have the will to pick yourself up after a failure and try again, you’ll never be able to progress in life. This isn’t always easy, especially when it comes to major life events like relationships. However, it’s essential that you find a way of getting past these setbacks. If you’re unable to face the possibility of failure, you’ll never be able to pick up the essential experience and life lessons that are waiting for you. It’s also highly unlikely that you’re going to be able to achieve your life goals on the first go.
If you want to get anywhere in the world, you’re going to need the perseverance to continue working at something even when you haven’t met with success the first time. This means developing something of a thick skin, as well as a philosophical and stoic outlook on life. If you can get yourself to a point where failure is no longer shameful but rather something that can teach you valuable lessons, you’ll be able to start building up your confidence in a big way. The more character building experiences you go through, the more you’ll be able to develop your confidence and become more relaxed at the prospect of taking on a challenge and maybe not succeeding.
3. Discipline is crucial if you want to see results
For some people, confidence is a completely natural attitude. Many charismatic people find it easy to make a conversation or pursue their own goals in their chosen fields. However, if you aren’t one of these lucky people, you’re going to need to instil a large amount of discipline in yourself. Once you’ve been able to form beneficial habits, you’ll be able to start reaping the rewards. However, getting to that point is not easy. You need to carry things out over and over again, to the point where it becomes natural behaviour rather than a conscious decision. In this way, you can essentially change your character and the way you interact with others. Many people find that, after a point, it no longer feels like they are faking it.
Learned behaviour becomes natural, and the confidence that you once had to fake is now a genuine aspect of your own personality. These processes are not simple, and they do take a large amount of dedication, as well as a large amount of mental discipline. However, if you’re willing to make the effort, you’re guaranteed to see results. Also, as things progress, these processes become easier and easier. Once they become a habit, the need for personal discipline is practically gone.
These great tips should go a long way in putting you on the path to greater self-confidence. While it may be a long journey, the more you put into it, the more you can get out. With time and discipline, just about anyone can become the confident person they want to be. Try these methods, and you’re sure to see some major changes.
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Author: Nika Goddard
Psychologist, writer-freelancer, traveller and just creative person, lover of world cultures, languages, food, wild spaces and urban places by nature. Beginner in web-design, this one is my recent creation.
